When You Can't Get Ahead

Last week was not my favorite.

Let me just take you through a summarized timeline of events that occurred in the 24 hours of Tuesday and Wednesday.

Tuesday started great because I was going to see a show with two friends. However, as I got home to change clothes and then hit the road to Nashville, I found my 15 year old family cat, dead.

Not such a fun thing to see when you’re currently pumped about life. So that was scarring to say the least.. I said my goodbyes, showered off the tears and took comfort in the fact that she lived a great life and was no longer in pain from whatever illness she had been dealing with.

When I finally arrived in Nashville, I realized my car was visibly smoking and smelled…..crispy.
But I needed to Uber to the show anyway so I refilled my coolant reservoir and hoped that it just needed a rest.

After the show I decided to take the trip to Kentucky super slow. I’m talking 55 in a 70 zone. It was already midnight by the time I was leaving and the trip seemed eternal. I actually ended up stopping a rest area to power nap once I found myself falling asleep at the wheel. Eventually I made it back to “almost” home before I could see the car was majorly smoking again.

I pulled off at a creepy gas station ten minutes from my house and weighed my options. 1) deal with a tow truck and logistics at 2am  when I can’t even think straight, 2) have my parents rescue me………at this ungodly hour, or 3) ignore everything and hope I don’t blow up on the way home.

I chose number three. Probably NOT the smartest decision but I was partially brain dead and the thought of my bed kind of pushed me towards that choice. Anyway, I did make it home in one piece and fell into bed for the lovely three hours of sleep I’d get before going to work at 7am.

Dad helped me look things over in the morning and we discovered a massive oil leak. An oil leak where I would lose an entire quart within an hour and oil was visibly dripping rapidly from underneath the car. Yippee.

I was clearly not going to work today. Instead I made a call to a trusted mechanic and started driving it slowly to the garage. My mom followed behind me and we made a pit stop at a gas station to grab another quart of oil  before we dropped it off. When I opened the hood, there was an eruption of fluorescent green goo on everything. Something had exploded coolant all over the engine bay. Tow truck time.

Ah. This is probably healthy

Triple A loaded Boone onto the truck and took him to the doctor. After the garage had time to look at the car, they let me know the damage. I needed new cam seals, a new radiator, and a new timing belt. And that’s all stuff they would need to put in before they could tell if my head gaskets were trashed. Grand total: $1100 (and more if the head gaskets are doomed). Time to cry a little more.

24 hours of emotional mess. Dead cat - Sad. Amazing show with friends - Joy. Car issues at 2am - Fear, impending doom of new credit card debt. Frustration, anxiety, and hopelessness.

I can’t even tell you the amount of money I have poured into this car. This car that I wanted so desperately that I searched for three years before pulling the trigger on it. This vehicle that I dreamed would be my constant companion, home on the road, and possibly my ticket to living in a new state…...and it has been nothing but maintenance. I know that is the story for an abundance of car owners, but it just seems like it happens to me a lot more than the average Jane. Every time I start to get a handle on my existing debt, loans, car payment, and savings, Boone decides to suck every penny out of me. Why you gotta be like that, dude?

.

But here’s the thing. It doesn't matter. When you keep feeling like you take one step forward and two steps back, you’re going to make it. If you look hard enough you can find good in even the most frustrating circumstances. That’s not easy, I know. And anyone who knows me in real life knows that I’m not very good at doing that.

Let’s take a look at the previous 24 hours and see the other side of the coin. My cat was a wonderful friend and she is no longer in pain in this world. My car didn’t break down on the side of the road, nor did it blow up causing me injury. My boss was completely understanding of my situation and there were no consequences for me calling out of work. My mom bought me a consolation iced coffee and I got to spend quality time with her.  Both of my parents were willing and able to help me get my car to the mechanic and also to ferry me to and from work when I needed it. So even though I won’t have a penny to my name for who knows how long, I still have a place to live, food to eat, a job to go to that will allow me to pay for these repairs, and a smartphone that works.

That’s a whole lot more than many could say.

When junk happens all at once (and really frequently) I’m not saying you can’t get frustrated. Believe me, I get extremely frustrated, anxious, and angry when these things happen. But maybe take a step back from the situation and re-calibrate. Weigh the good with the bad. Find a little peace, and then take action to do what you can to fix the situation. This year I’ve really been trying to live by a paraphrased version of 1 Thessalonians 5:16-17. Even if you aren’t religious, I think it’s encouraging.

“Choose Joy. Pray always.”

Post Script:
Sunday evening I noticed my car acting sluggish. Then the engine started dying every time I came to a complete stop or put in reverse. Probably about to shell out another $1000! Pray for me y'all.

My Favorite Outdoor Brands With a Focus on Ethics

This week I’m bringing you some recommendations. I get questions from time to time of what brands I keep gravitating back to. A lot of factors go into my decision making process when it’s time for new clothing or gear. I currently use a variation of the "capsule wardrobe" system and I try to carry that mindset into my gear purchases too. Less IS More! I buy better quality items from trusted brands so that I don't have to re-purchase as often. Until recently, I actually had a second Instagram account that I used to cultivate discussion and inspiration for my capsule wardrobe, minimalism journey, and healthy living.  (Recently I deleted it because let's be real, having two instagrams is a little extra....) I may showcase another post on those types of topics but we won't get into it right just yet.

This year I’ve made it a priority to buy more ethical (made by workers that are paid a fair wage and have a proper work environment), sustainable (manufactured in a way that makes a low impact environmentally), and good quality items. Being able to check all three of these boxes is definitely tricky especially with how mass manufactured the outdoor industry is these days. Most of my recommendations fit into these categories, but not necessarily all. However, if there is a trusted brand that isn’t on my list that you're a fan of, please tell me about it! I’m always on the lookout for products that cause the least amount of harm to this planet.

Patagonia

This is a no brainer. It’s the go-to brand EVERY person brings up when it comes to solid gear paired with a sustainable business model. This is a brand that literally uses the slogan “if it’s broke, fix it”. Nearly every product they offer is fair trade certified and a large number of their products use recycled materials. They are a B Corp certified brand and also are part of 1% for the planet. Some tend to complain about the price of Patagucci (I can’t believe I actually typed that) but I think you get exactly what you pay for. Their products have never failed me.

Favorites:
Black Hole Duffel 60L
Re toot Snap T fleece pullover
Torrentshell Jacket

Torrentshell

Re-tool Snap-T

Cotopaxi

Next up is a brand called Cotopaxi. I’ll level with you, I don’t actually own any of their products right now. But I should have a shiny new backpack coming at me in the next few months. I’ll be posting a full review of it once I get it and take it on a trip! ( I am so pumped!!)

Anyway, this brand has a super great slogan “gear for good”. They make a ton of their backpacks and jackets with remnant fabrics from properly compensated Filipino workers. This also allows you to get limited edition colors on different gear models. Which is pretty neat! They offer a lifetime warranty of 61 years on their products. This is symbolic of the average lifespan of a person living  in a third world country. Cotopaxi is B Corp certified and their website also has yearly global impact updates. 

Favorites:
Tecca windbreaker
Haraka Tights - been waiting for these to come back in stock!!

Toad & Co.

Toad & Co is a very eco friendly brand that utilizes a LOT of organic and sustainable materials. I love the effortless style each of their pieces radiates. Everything looks like you could be in the office, going to dinner, or going for a walk. Every product I have owned has been extremely well made even with products that happen to be constructed from thinner materials. Their website has extensive information about their ethics and sustainability endeavors. Toad and Co are also part of the Outdoor Industry Association Sustainability Working Group.

Favorites:
Marley SS Dress
Airbrush SL Deco Shirt

Osprey

When it comes to backpacks I’m a huge advocate for Osprey. I’m always a sucker for a lifetime warranty. If you break it, they fix it. This brand isn’t B Corp or a part of any large sustainability association that I can find, but on their website they have great information about their factories in Vietnam and the conditions therein. Also they have a great checklist of some of their brand’s culture of sustainability. I have a day pack and a backpacking pack from Osprey and I am always impressed by the quality and durability of their gear, trip after trip and mile after mile.

Favorites:
Womens AG Aura 65
Daylite Pack

Daylite

Aura AG 65

Columbia

Columbia is a recommendation I give out to everyone who needs a piece of gear that’s relatively cheap and also functional, not to mention that their pants actually fit curvy ladies. Lately, Columbia has taken great strides in creating recycled products. Specifically their “outdry ex eco jacket” that is made from 100% recycled polyester. Their website has a plethora of information about their stances on environmental issues and what collaborations they are a part of that share their sustainable manufacturing approach. I like the design of most of their products and if you are broke but need a cute fleece for a camping trip, some of their designs are reminiscent of Patagonia *wink wink*.

Favorites:
Back Beauty Skinny Pant
Saturday Trail Stretch Pant

Vasque

Vasque boots are seriously the best. You ever buy a pair of shoes for a special trip and then they hurt your feet for the entire weekend? You won't have to deal with that if you buy a pair of Vasque boots. I bought a pair for a backpacking trip, shipped them overnight, and wore them on the trail the next day. No blisters, no pain, no nothing. I cannot recommend them enough and believe me, finding shoes that fit my super wide feet is a rare occurrence. This brand has a new "for life" customer. Vasque is a part of parent company Red Wing Shoe Company which I don't happen to own any work boots, but I know the reputation they hold. Unfortunately there isn't much about sustainability on either Vasque or Red Wing's websites, but they are made in the USA

Favorites:
Talus Ultradry

Vasque Talus UltraDry

Those are six brands that I tend to buy from when I need something brand new, but I am a HUGE used buyer. I scour second hand websites for specific pieces of gear before I turn to the actual company's website to place an order.

Ebay has what I need 90% of the time and for a massive discount. Just be sure to search with as many specific terms as you can, and check a seller’s feedback history. It so much better to buy used instead of putting new pieces into the world.

Another good marketplace for outdoor gear is Gear Trade. It’s basically ebay for outdoor items. I’ve even sold a couple things there. It’s not the most well designed website out there, but it works and I’ve had great luck buying and selling.

In the age of “fast fashion” and “planned obsolescence” it’s seriously important to purchase with intent. Only buy when you need it, buy used if you can, and make sure what you’re buying doesn’t have a negative impact on the planet or on society, and buy a product that will last. Some may think that’s a hassle, but honestly, if you can make a small change, pay a few dollars more, and have an item that will last more than one season, what’s the harm in that?

How I got into the Outdoors

This is a question I get asked a whole lot. It's right up there with "How did you get into photography". The answers to both of those questions are extremely underwhelming but we are tackling the first one today.

Red River Gorge - 2015

Most people assume that I have been into outdoorsy stuff since I was little. Nope. I despised being dirty. My parents kept me super clean all the time. I never played sports, never jumped in mud puddles, and I never went barefoot if I could help it. The dirtiest thing I ever did was probably licking all our water color paints and painting our white cabinets in the living room at age one.

My mom grew up on a farm and was outside almost always. She worked extremely hard with her brothers and sisters, helping their parents running a large farm, harvesting crops, and tend to animals. It was hard work, but it wasn't exactly outdoor recreation for recreation's sake. 

Dad on the other hand was a city slicker -- a middle class preacher's kid. He grew up in Illinois and he worked a paper route. Fair skinned and red haired just like me, I don't think he liked to get outside too much. Applying that much sunscreen is always annoying (trust me). His dad loved fishing but that love didn't transfer through the generations. I think I only went fishing twice as a kid and that was always with Granddad.

So. I say all this to show that my parents had very different upbringings, and neither of them were filled with camping/hiking/backpacking and most definitely not rock climbing. 

I didn't even know what hiking for fun was. Walking around a zoo was bad enough. My dad was basically a professional race walker (look it up if you haven't seen people race walk because it is hysterical) until I was born, but that didn't imprint on us kids. We never ran, walked, or anything. I honestly don't know how all three of us aren't fat. Biking was for the driveway, walking was for the zoo, and camping?.........how do you even do that?

I only remember one family camping trip and it was a doozy. The whole family attempted sleeping in the tent, but it got so cold that mom and I bailed and ended up sleeping in the family GMC Safari because we couldn't hack laying on the ground all night. Sorry boys, ladies get special treatment.

After that experience I stayed away from anything too cold, too uncomfortable, or too hot (summer camp was always a struggle. They expect us to play kick ball???? OUTSIDE????). I had no idea what I was missing out on.

My family went to Colorado for the first time when I was eight years old and then again when I was fifteen. The first trip we took was incredible. We made a massive loop through the west and we saw Pikes Peak, the Grand Canyon, The Pueblos, The Painted Desert, The Petrified Forest, Four corners, and The Meteor Crater. It was cool, but for an eight year old who just wanted to play with her stuffed animal lion, the experience was a little wasted on me. As a teenager, Colorado was a lot more interesting. I had just bought a new camera so I was taking photos like crazy. My brother tried rock climbing (which at that point, I thought was insane. My how years change your attitude!), and we walked around Garden of the Gods. It wasn't really hiking, but I was starting to appreciate God's creation a little bit more.

First time out west at age eight. Killin' it in the gingham shorts. - 2002

It wasn't until 2014 when I came back from two years in college in Florida, dropped out of school, and suffered a severe breakup with my (ex) fiance, that the outdoors popped into my life in a big way. At that point I was a total Tumblr girl (that's a really ridiculous blogging site where you just repost other people's nice photos and complain about your life in whiny text posts) and had started seeing all these incredible photos of gorgeous landscapes, and campfires, and people experiencing the world by living out of a backpack. Maybe I should go outside more? 

As I tried to stopped isolating myself after my traumatic relationship, I came to know a couple super amazing ladies who had a ton more outdoors experience than me. We started taking day trips to hiking locations around the south and even kayaked in the summers. I'd also started rock climbing with my brother at the gym in Nashville.

Climbing was a lifesaver for me. When you are depressed or struggling with any sort of mental issues, I recommend climbing. It's a simple but challenging task that takes every portion of your brain to get you from A to B. It doesn't leave room for all the internal struggles you've been dealing with. You are alone on the wall with no distractions. It's incredible. 

First year of climbing - 2014

My good friend Amanda ended up moving back to her home state of Washington in 2014 right after we'd started growing closer. I immediately bought a plane ticket and went to visit. That trip was perfect. I'd never seen such beauty in all my life. Waterfalls, mountains, rivers, canyons, massive rainforests, and gloomy beaches. I wanted to explore all of it. On that trip I camped for the first time and really gained the confidence to start exploring more on my own. 

First time in WA - 2014

From then on, i've been spending as much time outdoors as I can. I've sunk who knows how much money into gear, fuel, and food. Not to mention the countless hours spent scouring the internet for the best gear reviews, hiking locations, and information on how to survive outdoors. I've hiked almost every waterfall that Tennessee has to offer and driven all around Kentucky to find new views. I haven't even made a dent in what these southern states have to offer; which is simultaneously exciting and frustrating. I've got a lot more exploring to do. 

North Carolina - 2015

So that's my underwhelming story. A kid who never went outside, who now gets stir crazy if she hasn't hiked in a few weeks. No matter how you were raised and no matter how little you know about the outdoors, I promise you can learn. Search for the places close to you, read a blog, look at instagram, even read a guide book. There is no shortage of resources these days for those willing to seek it.

Advice for the First Time Backpacker

I am by definition a novice backpacker. So don't think i've been on some incredible life changing thru hike. I've literally been on two trails. That's it. Though I will fight anyone who says the Fiery Gizard Trail is easy....

My first two trips were such a great learning experience and they've set me up for years of more prepared backpacking. I thought I would share some of my (extremely limited) wisdom for the first time backpacker. 

Go with someone who knows what they are doing.

Make sure you aren’t stuck in the backcountry with someone who hasn’t done the appropriate research about your trip. Make sure you have proper water sources, enough food, you know precisely what paths you are taking, etc.

No matter how tempting it is to go on a jumbled, thrown together, “let’s just GO!” backpacking weekend, I don’t recommend seeking out THAT big of an adventure if you are just as inexperienced as the dumbo planning it. My first trip was planned and executed with incredible precision by a trusted, experienced Boy Scout leader. That’s the type of trail captain you want for your first trip.

Don’t overdo it on your first trip.

You don’t need an expedition the first time you’re dipping your toes in the backcountry waters. I’d suggest keeping your total mileage between 10-15 miles (or less! My first trip was only 6!) with minimal elevation gain. This is most likely your first time carrying all of your belongings on your back for an extended time. Don’t ask too much of yourself.

Borrow. Don’t buy.

Now this is a suggestion I didn’t follow. I knew that when I went on my first trip that I would be using my gear for years to come. But if this a completely new activity for you, I encourage you to try borrow a friend’s gear instead. You can spend anywhere from $250-$1,000 on backpacking equipment (frighteningly easy to do, no matter how absurd that seems), so save your cash and borrow or rent some equipment until you’re ready to make the investment.

For locals, I know that there is backpacking equipment available to rent through ORAC at WKU!

Don’t pack your bag alone.

Ask questions at your local outdoor store, or the ask the trip leader how to pack efficiently. I promise you there will be no judging. Backpackers love to nerd out about their kit. Make sure you learn the method of weight distribution when packing. It’ll make your miles a whole lot easier to bear.

Don’t over pack

If you’ve done any backpacking research you’re going to have already read about weight, weight, weight. Your base weight is important. This includes your entire pack and contents minus your consumables (your food and water). You don’t want to be staggering through the woods with a 7 pound tent, 4 pound sleeping bag and a 2 pound sleeping pad. Keep your essentials lightweight so you have enough room/energy to haul your water and meals. Clothing takes up a TON of room. Try to plan out what you’ll wear each moment of the trip

Subpoint: layer, layer, layer. Make sure all clothing works together and is multipurpose. Bring lightweight layers you can piles on in case of colder temperatures, and then ditch when the sun comes out.

Don’t be so worried about weight that you leave out a few comfort items.

I know this seems to contradict the previous point, but just listen. There are a couple things you might want to bring along to make “roughin’ it” a little bit less…rough! My biggest things are:

Extra pair of camp socks for the evenings. Keep those feet dry and warm at the end of the day!

In-camp shoes. I am partial to Birkenstocks (they are lightweight and easily lashed to your pack) for my camp shoes, but a dollar pair of flip flops are great too. Believe me, after you’ve been walking miles in a day, you are going to want to ditch those chunky hiking shoes and let those barking dogs breathe.

Extra bras and underwear. I’m going to be real (and we haven’t even gotten to pooping out doors yet…..) I’m a sweater. And if I’m hiking or backpacking in temperatures above 75, it’s not going to be pretty. Being able to change into dryer clothing for the night is a major blessing

Share weight when possible.

Coordinate with your trail peeps and make sure you all aren’t packing multiples. You don’t need five stoves, ten canisters of propane, four bottles of sunscreen (well, if I’m with you that may be necessary – redhead problems.), and three water filters. You only need one of each with maybe a few backups depending on the trip. Communication is key.

If you’re cool with sharing tents, split up the poles/rainfly/tent into two or three hiker’s packs. That way one person isn’t stuck with the full weight.

No bathrooms. Don’t freak out.

Pooping in the woods is inevitable. And it’s weird. But here’s the thing, you’re going to be way more uncomfortable if you try to hold it. Fight through the fact that you’re going to be naked and feeling a little too vulnerable. It’s honestly not as bad after the first time. Make sure you learn how to dig a “cat hole” and bring a tiny trowel to share with the group. You’re gonna feel super proud of yourself after you take care of backwoods business. And for you ladies who may be dealing with Mother Nature on a trip, bring plenty of plastic baggies to carry out your trash, don’t bury that non-biodegradable stuff.

Attitude Issues (This one is for me)

I’m mashing three points into one title here.

• Stay positive and keep complaining to a minimum (unless there’s a legitimate problem obviously!)
  • Everyone is hot, everyone is tired. Point out the great things instead of dwelling on momentary discomfort. No one made you come on the trip!
• If you are truly struggling, don’t keep it to yourself.
  • You’re companions have no idea If the pace is too fast or you need to break for extra snacks or water. They won’t be able to help if they don’t know! I’ve had full blown panic attacks on trips before, and It was totally okay to take a while and get back to normal. Everyone is going to be so kind and helpful if you give them a chance!
• If the first trip is awful. Give it another chance.
  • Learn from what made it bad and make the appropriate changes for the next outing. Remember, second or third time’s the charm!

Maybe this list was a no brainer to some, but hopefully it was helpful for someone who's never ventured out for more than a day hike. I think everyone should carry their belongings on their back for a few nights and see how little you actually need to survive.

Happy packing!